Gloominess isn't always sadness

Today I only made 19 dollars for almost five hours of work, "right in the kicker sir". It was a painful few hours of few tables, and quiet customers. There were times that I was wandering around the restaurant, pining for something to do. I asked to be taught how to make one of the pizzas, my friend obliged, and I made a combination pizza, but then I had to move on. 

I unfolded 600 napkins, a responsibility that is given to the section that I was in, within 10 minutes. Then, again I began to roam. I walked around, talking with various people of different sections of the restaurant, contemplating the deeper things in life and wishing that it would start raining again....

Rain

One of my favorite things on the this planet, no exaggeration, is rain.

 I love the feeling it gives me and it's ability to heighten all 5 senses. 

We can breathe in the coolness of the air and let it fill our lungs, giving a frosty feeling to our insides. It was literally touch us on the face, arms, legs, and burr us to the bone. We can taste it as it dribbles down on tired faces or let it fall straight into our open mouths. The visions it creates within ponds, rivers, streams, and oceans, looks as if ballerinas are dancing across large timpani's. Which leads to the best part, the sound. 

The sound it omits is, more than likely, one of the most refreshing and calming sounds ever to be created. It moves gently across all senses once again and creates an almost, euphoric, feeling. A feeling that invites blankets to be tossed upon couples, and hands to be held, and lips to be kissed. 

If anyone were writing a novel, they wouldn't be far from saying rain was a matchmaker. 

But with rain comes gloom. The clouds outshine the sun and cover the source of "happiness" or vitamin exposure. It covers what we deem one of the most important sources of energy we have, if but for a little while. 

Life is like rain and gloom. 

There are times in life that we feel the gloom has overshadowed the bright sunny sunshine, replacing hope with fear. I think that we have moments in the gloom, which is preparing itself for rain, a new beginning. 

Rain washes away rust, regret, indecision, and fear from the pavement streets and replaces it with a musty warmth. The dirt is paved away to reveal dew, brighter and fuller color, and a fresh new smell that can only be brought on after the gloom has begun and had its time. 

Summer is quickly falling away

It's been a long summer, one where Matt and I have mostly stayed at home working and spending time with each other.
I have been working some long hours and some not long hours at Brick Oven as a server, and I have been LOVING it (starting Monday I'll mostly be working nights , so come at see me!) learning how it is to live off someone's tips.

Soapbox moment:
A little lesson in tipping. If you go to a restaurant where you don't have to do squat while you are there.. i.e. fill your drinks, punch in your food, make sure it comes out right, get it out to you in a timely manner, re-fill your drinks, take away dishes, replace silverware, retrieve additional straws and napkins, clean after your messy (but darling) children, and (with more included) live off what you pay me in tips... tip well.
Even if the service isn't "perfect", at least tip your waiter 10%, but more on upwards to the 15%-20% range. I know that you may not be able to afford the tip...but then why are you eating out?
Anyway, tip knowledge for ya:

A tip is 10%
A decent tip is 15%
A great tip is 20% or over

Now calculating tip isn't very hard. Let's say you bought:
8inch pizza dinner - 8.49
Drink (Dr. Pepper) - 2.49
Even this adds up to about 12.00 dollars in monies.
Now think back, for a moment, when you were in algebra and learning percentages.
To find what is 10% of 12.00 you move the decimal over one place to the left, thus resulting in a $1.20 tip.
Now stop, before you write that on your visa receipt or give that $1.20 cash, do you really think someone can pay for food, rent, family matters, and other things with a $1.20? No.
Now bump that $1.20 up by 10% more, you have $2.40, right?
Now is $2.40 a lot in the grand scheme of things? No.
Is $2.40 going to rattle your checkbook dry? No.
So by golly, leave a better tip! Shoot for 20%.
Be a decent person, and don't condemn my job choice when I actually LOVE serving you. I haven't felt this happy going to work in a long time, because I LOVE food, I LOVE interacting with people, and I LOVE serving you. So help make my job a little easier and tipping me and all waiters, who enjoy their job and like being there, a little better.
Thank you!

Soapbox, disengaged.

Back to our summers escapades:
I wish I could say that we went on a week long cruise around Jamaica or swam with dolphins among the waves of bora-bora, but we didn't.
Although we didn't do those things we have learned a lot about us as a couple, our lives in the future, and have gotten answers to, used to be, unknown questions.
We have learned more about Matt's brain injury and are on a path to, not so much correcting, but developing routines for a more fulfilled life. He has gotten in touch with a fantastic neuro-psycologist, who is nothing short of an answer to our prayers. He has such incredible insights about the brain and the way it functions which will lead Matt to develop those traits to make it as though the accident never  happened. We both feel incredibly blessed at the current moment.
There are a few people, who I don't know who you are, that I would like to thank personally, on this blog.
A few nights ago (roughly about a week) we received a quiet knock on our door. It being almost 9:30 at night, we were a little apprehensive about opening the door, and after waiting a few seconds, flipped the light switch and had a look to who was outside.
Instead of finding a person, we found 6-7 overflowing bags of food lying on our front porch with a little note attached (and 60 dollars inside). These wonderful people, whoever you are, helped in more ways than they will ever be able to understand.
Just the night before we were talking about budgeting and how it was going to be a little tight and moments later (if not hours) we receive this gift of generosity and kindness.
So, from the deepest tresses of my heart, whoever you are, thank you. We have prayed for you often and are so grateful for your kindness.

Well that's the little update with the hubster. I did find out recently that we be able to go down to my Dad's in Florida for New Year's this year! I am so excited. We haven't been able to see my Dad since we have gotten married, almost 1 1/2 years ago. Crazy how time flies.
Now,
School is starting, didn't you know, next week. And I have gotten my student teaching license! I can now finish my education and graduate, with a bachelor's degree!!
So, I'm moving up in the world and I get to have along side me my cousin Ashleigh, Leah, and Veraunica!!! It's going to be a great year and a great way to end my college career for the present.

Recently...

-I have consistently worked 30 hours each week at Brick Oven, while bringing 10 dollars each hour!
-I saw Perseid meteor shower with Ashleigh and successfully saw 40 shooting stars in the span of an hour, narrowly missed being hit by two rounds of sprinklers, and gazed on yard sale find lawn-chairs.
-I have read 6 of the 7 "Chronicles of Narnia" and I am determined to finish the series before the beginning of school (12 days, I think I can do it)
-I was able to get  a new driver's license, debit card, and new student  card after my wallet was stolen in Sugarhouse.
-My friend Kaylee, from Nauvoo, is staying with Matt and I for a week and a few days (it is fun having her around)
-Our Pax is growing well and is a feisty little girl.
-There is so much good in the world, and willing people to help whenever help is needed

and in ending..
-I found out that Matt and I get to spend New Years with my dad, Xan, grandparents, and hopefully my brother James in Florida!!!
-I may get a full pell grant for my last school year
-There are good people in all places.

Times in life

You know there are times in your life when you think you can't go anymore, you can't take another bad day, and you can't deal with what is going on around you. We have all had them, all experienced them. It's just apart of life and the way we live. With happiness, comes sadness. Virtue cannot be without vice. Good, should always triumph over evil, but does not always find a way to.

Life throws curve balls, especially at times when you know you were following promptings and feelings to pursue certain life choices. As soon as you make a large choice the Lord tries your faith. He comes in and throws wrenches, screwdrivers, and hammers into the mix, and watches as you wriggle around trying to organize life again.

 He wants to see if you'll ask for his help. 

I've found that even a midst the hard days, uneventful appointments, and unmotivated movements, there comes light. The little things begin to count more, and mean more. 

So, I don't know what else I wanted to say, but that is all I think. Yep, little things mean more.  

Pick me Up Quotes: When my own words can't express

I'm happy, because God's on my team.

I have so much going through my head, so much responsibility looming, that I don't know how to write about it. It's all good things, don't get me wrong, but a lot of responsibility.
I am growing up.
Ha ha, I thought I was already grown up, that's a lie.
Each day I am learning more and more about the use of money and how it doesn't get you very far.
I know how it feels to live paycheck to paycheck, just scrounging enough money to pay for rent.
I know how it feels to feel uncertain about a medical condition and then find hope in a doctor who was hiding in the rafters, just waiting for him to acknowledge his wealth of know how.
I know how it feels to wake up and not want to get out of bed because it's too comfortable, it's too cozy, it isn't work.
I know how it feels to enjoy my job and I know how it feels to pray before I go to work that people will be generous with their money.
I know how tithing works, it works...every. time.
I know how it is to give advice and not have it heeded and to watch sadness exhume from friends and family who have to learn what I have already learned.
I'm happy.
So happy that I can't express it in words.
But with happiness, I have learned, comes doubt, fear, uncertainty, and anxiety.
"With God, all things are possible" ...ain't that true.

It's the purest and most truthful words ever spoken.
It will always work out with God on your team.
I know he is on our team and everything will workout.