Oh high scool angst

I was going through my myspace blog today..random I know and was reading all the "horrible" things that were happening in my life at the time. Oh my goodness to the heavens and back I was an angsty teenager. I was so jealous of everyone in my life, jealous of how people could sing better than me, how people could dress better, look better and such. I'm not going to lie, i had a hard time finding myself in high school. I was not the most attractive girl around and for awhile there I didn't know what personal hygiene was. I cringe for my poor friends having to be around me back then. I'm sorry for that, the stink that I must of had. I look back now and I have no idea why i felt that way back then, that certain things I was fretting about weren't a huge deal. They were small, little things, that are far into the past and i'm happy that alot of things that I wished would have happened, didn't. It's amazing looking back and seeing a change in yourself that you didn't know had happened. I was ranting on about a guy problem(s) about a guy liking me that I didn't like anymore and he wouldn't leave me alone, and then whining in the next blog about one guy not liking me but me liking him (wow i didn't see the reoccurring theme...) Oh well, but really high school was easy peasey compared to things in life coming in soon years or years far into the future. I guess we all go through these levels of maturity and immaturity and just have to find ourselves slowly through all the angst and so called drama of our lives. (But i'm not gonna lie drama in high school was definitely drama oriented, but gave me some of my best friends and best moments of my high school time.) Anyway, i'm still chuckling a little bit under my breath at the drama queen I was in my blogs and the depressed little girl that lives in them. Oh well, we learn and we grow. We look back and see how and where we have learned to be different. It gives you an odd sense that life is worth living and that you really do learn things down here, just not in the time frame that you had planned for yourself. A lot of this life, I am starting to realize is in the Lord's hands. Oh wait, all of it is. What a relief :)