Chivarly in the 21st century

This article was on yahoo- life pages. It is discussing a study that says that guys who are chivalrous are being harmfully sexist...read on.

"With the excellent debate going on in response to our recent Wise Guys question about men behaving chivalrously, we thought we’d stir the pot a bit by mentioning studies that suggest chivalrous behavior is a subtle yet harmful form of sexism, known as benevolent sexism. The term was coined in 1996 by the first study of this kind (as far as we know), which showed that men who exhibit signs of chivalry (opening doors open for women, always paying for the date, being protective) often exhibit signs of hostile sexism as well (thinking of women as less intelligent, weaker creatures whose place is in the home). These findings were supported by another study by the University of Michigan several years later. Dr. Daisy Grewal, writing forPsychology Today earlier this year, has a compelling round-up of a lot of the research on the topic, saying that “Both perspectives [hostile and benevolent sexism] fail to view women as multi-faceted equals to men.” She gets a heated response from a fellow Psych Today blogger, but Grewal holds her own in the comments section of that post (plus, that is the haircut of a smarmy benevolent sexist if ever we saw one). Have a read, then please to discuss." - (http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/sex/studies-show-chivalry-is-sexist-476383/;_ylt=Avl1eCh6JUdHKdMZx0c5uPaBbqU5)

First off, i'd like to say that, that is the stupidest thing I have ever heard. I know that women want to feel like they are independent and in control of their lives. But a guy opening the door for you, or paying for the date isn't a crime nor is it sexist, in my opinion. He is being a gentlemen, which is something these days that almost seems like an urban legend to some people. Of course women want to be on the same level as men, but by letting him open the door isn't stamping on your self worth. It is showing that he wants to be Chivarlous and help you. He isn't trying to say, "i'm better than you, or I want to be in control of you...yada yada yada" I think women especially those who are having a slight power trip need to take a step back and not get so offended when a guy does something nice.

For me personally i love it when a man opens the door for me, pulls out my chair and on occasion pays for the date (when he asked me ON the date) ---I don't take it as him demeaning me or being sexist in anyway. I see it as him being a gentlemen and it takes me off guard sometimes, because it has become so irregular that it makes me feel even more special when a guy steps out of this sexist mind set and does something for me like that.

So men, PLEASE, be Chivarlous, open doors, walk your girl to her door, pay for the date (don't be cheap, especially if you asked her) , treat her like a princess and make her feel special, because 9 times out of 10 you'll definately get a second date by being a gentlemen, than by being a guy who goes along with the women who wanted to be treated "equally" or like a man. Seriously, i don't know what they are on, but it isn't estrogen. :)